Friday Five: Happy Lent!

Sophia at RevGals writes:

Each year you give us this joyful season when we prepare to celebrate the Paschal Mystery with mind and heart renewed. You give us a spirit of loving reverence for you, our [Mother]/Father, and of willing service to our neighbor. As we recall the great events that gave us new life in Christ, you bring the image of your Son to perfection within us.... (First Preface for Lent, Roman Missal)

1. Did you celebrate Mardi Gras/Shrove Tuesday this year? Any memories of memorable celebrations past?
Does watching the Olympics count? Then, YES!

2. How about Ash Wednesday, past and/or present?
This year I was not at a formal service. In the past I have helped officiate. It is probably the most humbling task a pastor can do, next to leading the Communion service.


3. Does your denomination or congregation celebrate "this joyful season"? Any special emphases or practices to share?
Our congregation? NO. Individuals within it? YES but it is not something that is cultivated. This year someone is teaching a class that is timed to culminate at Easter, but it's not titled as a Lenten class.

This year I am reading the Daily Office through the ESV website. There is something very heart-focusing about praying through the Psalms and prayers of the Book of Common Prayer for Lent.

4. Do you have a personal plan of give-ups, take-ons, special ministries, and/or a special focus for your own spiritual growth between now and Easter?
I blogged about this briefly a few days ago.  Basically I am working on being more intentional and thoughtful in my daily actions. I got the idea as I was thinking about all of the diets that I have tried and failed on because they were too far from the mainstream of the way I live. So while abstaining from something or adding a new routine is great, for me it doesn't have any lasting "sticking" power. I am working on intentionality and being fully present. I believe it is a place where God wants to rub off my roughest edges.  (BTW - in case you wondered - 2 days in, it hurts. But it's good.)

5. What is your dream for the image of Christ coming to perfection in you, the church, the world? How can we support you in prayer?
I'm in "launch mode" right now. I'm finishing my last semester of regular classes for my M.Div. (HALLELUJAH!!!!!!) I'm also applying for a summer CPE unit, and looking to do a second one and become a Board-Certified Chaplain in the next year. In spending time with my mentor and spiritual director, it seems that this is where God is bringing me in my career plans. My prayer has always been "use me, spend me -- but only where you want me!"  I would appreciate prayers for clarity and discernment.

Bonus: Song, prayer, picture, etc. that sums up your feelings about this liturgical springtime. 

First a Picture Bonus!  I went and cut some forsythia just before our back-to-back big snows that started on February 5th. The buds have just started opening. It reminds me of the hymn Now the Green Blade Riseth...

Now the green blade riseth from the buried grain,
Wheat that in the dark earth many days has lain;
Love lives again, that with the dead has been:
Love is come again, like wheat that springeth green.

In the grave they laid him, love whom men had slain,
Thinking that never he would wake again.
Laid in the earth like grain that sleeps unseen:
Love is come again, like wheat that springeth green,

Forth he came at Easter, like the risen grain,
He that for three days in the grave had lain.
Quick from the dead my risen Lord is seen:
Love is come again, like wheat that springeth green.

When our hearts are wintry, grieving, or in pain,
Thy touch can call us back to life again;
Fields of our hearts that dead and bare have been:
Love is come again, like wheat that springeth green.
John MacLeod Campbell Crum (1872-1958)


And here's a Poetry Bonus!  This arrived in my email this morning... I found it to be EXACTLY what I needed to read and pray through.

Dear God,

Speak gently in my silence.

When the loud outer noises of my surroundings

and the loud inner noises of my fears

keep pulling me away from you,

help me to trust that you are still there

even when I am unable to hear you.

Give me ears to listen to your small, soft voice saying:

"Come to me, you who are overburdened,

and I will give you rest...

for I am gentle and humble of heart."

Let that loving voice be my guide.

Amen.

~Henri Nouwen, With Open Hands

Ashes to ashes...

Ash Wednesday, today, marks the start of Lent. It is the season of reflection and remembrance on the liturgical calendar of the Passion of the Christ, culminating on Easter Sunday. It's not a regular practice (at least by that name) in my present church. However, it is something that I try to at least work into my spiritual consciousness every year.

I debated what I should "give up" or "start doing" (common ways of bringing an external meaning to a humanly constructed religious practice.) In the past, I've given up everything from chocolate to coffee to going to movies. Usually the "deprivation" isn't really that difficult, and I am remarkably good at finding another substitute as my "work-around"... It's far too easy for me to go off coffee and start drinking tea, for instance. My problem on a day-to-day basis is not as much denial as it is of balance and self discipline. It is overcompensating instead of remaining a true reflection of God and Christ, of living in the Spirit not within my own wishes and preferences.

So for this Lenten season, I am going to work at exercising a thoughtful, measured, and careful use of my time, talent and treasures. It might mean spending a day with a friend, just sharing the journey. It might mean less time of Facebook and more time face-to-face. It might mean a more consistent (weekly?) fasting regimen. It could come in the form of enjoying the pretzels I munch on as I study instead of mindlessly shoveling them in my mouth. It will mean that I don't shop unless I "need" to. It gets things off my "procrastination list." (You may call it a "DO LIST" but I have one which still has 'send out Christmas letters' on the top of it...)

So I'm attempting to be more aware, more intentional, more yielded... and less driven, less demanding, less distracted.

I'll let you know how it goes...

Lenten plans

I have been considering what I want to do to bring the season of Lent closer to my mind and heart this year. It is far too easy in a nondenominational setting to just let the liturgical seasons fly by unnoticed.

From my public school days, I remember classmates who were 'giving up chocolate' or 'giving up the radio' and I never could figure out why. Our mainline denomination basically had more music rehearsals for Palm Sunday Easter music. And that was all I really remember, liturgically speaking.

This year I have the happy task of taking my last classes for my M.Div. and (hallelujah) only have a few thousand pages of intensive reading left. So I knew anything I did would not be along the lines of reading a book. My spiritual formation partner and I are going to read the daily offices for Lent. (They are online here should you like to read along.) I'm looking forward to that.

But the dilemma remains... what should I do or not do as part of the next forty days of Lent? That's what I'm pondering.

Weather permitting, I hope to get in a Silent Retreat on Ash Wednesday at Dayspring Retreat Center near me. Perhaps God will crystallize for me what it is that I can do to bring home the Passion and the Cross.

Still pondering this one...

More than enough...

Six weeks have gone by...

Lent is done and the weeks of Easter are here. I have been pondering what I have really accomplished in six weeks. Oh sure, there's been assignments ad nauseum for seminary. I don't think that counts for much. You can't measure life in terms of papers, projects and pseudo-sermons... At least, I sure don't want to live life that way!!

So I have reflected on the last several weeks and considered what I've learned or watched others learn...

I feel as though I have not done enough. Not even close... and this is a bit discouraging.

• I had some goals for Lent that I tried to take on this year. I wanted to give up chocolate, and commit to memorize Colossians 3. Lest anyone reading this think that being in seminary is some ticket to holiness, or that I've got it all-together, I'd like to tell you straight up - I blew it! I've learned that I do not have the self-discipline to watch with Him one hour... let alone deprive myself of six weeks of chocolate. Now that's pretty lame! Not that I had chocolate that often... but I did not make it six weeks without it. And it was pretty interesting, because once I succumbed, it was easier and easier and easier to just have 'one little taste'. And the memory work? Fuggedaboutit! I can't blame it on anything other than a lack of desire to just DO it!


• I listened to two bright, gifted Christian singles justify why they should be dating/marrying someone who is not a Christian... that it would be OK... that things would work out if they were kind enough or godly enough and that would bring their unbelieving partner to see Christ for Who He Is... I offered some gentle thoughts and was ignored (and in one case, yelled at for being "judgmental") and so I leave their relationships in God's Hands, since He is indeed better at caring for them anyway.


• I watched as my mother-in-law, who by her own choices, made her life miserable and depressing... and knew that I could not change her attitude, but I could change my response to one of acceptance of her in her unhappiness (and not try to change it!) And my Beloved Bearded Spouse and I continue to struggle with this one...


• I worshipped the Creator in the middle of the Baltimore Aquarium... Who else but GOD could had made fish with neon stripes and gave us birds who looked like their feathers came from a Crayola box??
  


• I have missed seeing my family, and spending time with them at the beach as we have done many a spring break...
  


• I have been moved to tears by music, to laughter by a cat and her wuzzled catnip mouse, to silence by a bird's song in my window, to words of hope from a morning scripture reading...

I am so far from where I could be. I can look back and see little glimpses of God at work in and through me. Was it all I could have done? Not nearly. Fortunately, God's love for me does not depend on my ability to DO anything... it rests only in what He DID!

All of you is more than enough for all of me,
for ev'ry thirst and ev'ry need.
You satisfy with with Your love..
'Cause all I have in You
is more than enough...
[Chris Tomlin]

Yes... He satisfies and it is indeed MORE than "enough" for me...

From our home to yours...
Deb

Only Grace

There's only grace
There's only love
There's only mercy
And believe me it's enough
Your sins are gone
Without a trace
There's nothing left now
There's only grace
- Matthew West

This song is really speaking to me right now. Maybe it's because I'm studying intensely in the Old Testament prophets and seeing how easy it is to become "religious" and not remember the God of the covenant.

Lord, have mercy...
Christ, have mercy...
Deb

Ash Wednesday

You asked, 'Who is this that obscures my counsel without knowledge?'
Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know.
"You said, 'Listen now, and I will speak; I will question you, and you shall answer Me.'
My ears had heard of You but now my eyes have seen You. Therefore I despise myself and repent in dust and ashes."

Job 42:3-6

I'm from a relatively non-liturgical background. Yet, I like to mark the seasons and remember the passing of Lent. It seems to me to be a fitting way to prepare for the joyous celebration of Easter. It is important! Sometimes in the moment, in the rush, in the desire to get papers written, songs learned, talks given, and studies led, I forget. I forget that without God's Gift I would be hopelessly on my own.

I have a double-edged discipline for Lent. I give up and I add on.

I am giving up chocolate. Sounds childish. But for a chocoholic, it is a good self-discipline. And my waistline won't really miss it.

I am adding on two disciplines...

1. I am memorizing Colossians 3 (enough procrastinating! I need to DO it!)
2. I am adding a weekly fast to my routine. (I am not going to tell you which day because I want to do it without drawing attention to it.)

Holy Fire....
burn away my desire for anything
That is not of You
and is of me
I want more of You
and less of me.
Empty me...
[Jeremy Camp]

Deb